Thinking Solitude

Last Sunday our pastor encouraged us to find solitude--the quiet place in life to listen to what God may have to say, or just to clear our minds of the constant din of modern life. He suggested that we turn off the radio in the car for the week as a way to find that solitude. Because I am a good sport, I am keeping the radio off this week. But finding solitude has not been an issue for me since April.

I run by myself 98% of the time. I don't mind having someone else run with me, but I do not feel the same need for it that some others seem to. For me, running = solitude. When I run I am free to allow my mind to be still, or to be filled with thoughts. (While I do pay attention, it doesn't take too much brain power to run a loop from Point A back to Point A.) There are some common places that my mind wanders and sometimes I wonder why. When you put your mind in neutral, why does it go one place or another? Does it go to what is most important? Most pressing? Most pleasant? Most feared? Running has carved out space in my life for me to think.

If I were to stop running after the Twin Cities marathon, I think that I would miss the solitude most of all (or maybe the endorphins--hard to tell). I do not have any other margin in my life just to think. If it were not for running time, when would I think about my career? My family? My past and future? The possibilities? What I would do if I won the lottery? If I did not take time to think, I suppose that the miles would feel even longer than they do. Someone I know does multiplication tables in her head to pass the time. It works for her, but I would rather think.